Hey, don’t everyone thank me at once!
As my gift to this country that I love so much, I personally fixed that whole unemployment problem there by lowerin’ the unemployment rate from 10.2% to 10.0% last month. It was obvious that rampant socialism wasn’t gettin’ the job done, and that someone had to goose the free markets to get things rollin’ again. And I am that goose.
How, you may ask, did I save the country? With my book, of course! The publishing company had to hire millions (-ish) of new workers to print additional copies, plus all those pilots, stewardesses, and associated airport employees needed for my bus tour, and also all those additional mall employess for the crush of humanity linin’ up to get there books signed. The waves of free market activity are like a giant tiramisu rollin’ across the ocean!