Tag: U2

Wife of Famous Politician To Be Banned From Large Blog For Promoting CT

Berkeley, CA

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

(DDT) The moderator of the world’s best known blog for policing impure political thoughts, [redacted], today finally banned the wife of the world’s most famous retired politician for promoting and distributing an unproven Conspiracy Theory.  

In a move sure to create controversy in [redacted] and other sites around the blogosphere, an anonymous, off the record spokesperson for [redacted] confirmed that

The FAQ says no conspiracy theories, no exceptions.
Certainly this poster was aware of the rule, he or she chose to ignore it, and we decided to ban this person immediately. Any other remaining posters using this website, caught uprating other users who uprated the banned user, will be warned once and their posting ability suspended for the next 2,666 years until a bipartisan tribunal can be assembled to judge the purity of their thoughts and the intent of their actions.

Anyone caught discussing  this particular conspiracy theory in any diary, comment, or cat picture with caption, on this website, or any other website we had a FPer, administrator, or grandma click on deliberately or accidentally in the past 48 hours, or the next century, will also be warned once and then banned.  

Extraordinary claims, such as being made by this poster,  require extraordinary evidence.

We have reviewed the evidence, and have found no proof that anything untoward or unusual was consumed by the poster in question, or her husband.  

Further scrutiny reveals that the source of the rumors were obviously not Americans, and therefore never to be trusted.  You can’t trust those pesky Irish musicians. Never.  Everybody knows the Irish are a bunch of overimbibing, socialist Celtic Pagans, or maybe Druids, who knows, they all look alike, they who hate this country, and plot its downfall or at least plan to inflict their wretched European commie ginger haired marxist worker’s rights universal healthcare on us, which would destroy the delicate, negotiated detente we’ve negotiated with Kent Conrad and his very special donors.  Anyone caught posting youtubes of any music of the above, or posting recipes containing potato or cabbage ingredients, will also be banned.    

We here at [redacted] take election integrity very seriously.   We’ve banned thousands of people for far more, and we’ll ban as many people as possible for far less, for even having these impure thoughts.  

You have all been warned. Henceforth, by the Power Invested in Me, as Commander in Chief of the [redacted], this topic will not be discussed anymore on this website. Forever. Until the end of time.  

We have an election to win.  Look forwards, not back.

Example of Irish people being subversive and undermining the American pragmatic progressive agenda. Note upraised arms and dancing in audience, outside the white castle walls, clear indications of wanting a unicorn.

This is Amerika, Damnit !  We don’t DO unicorns!  We do Hope Nobody Notices!

The heart is a bloom

Shoots up through the stony ground

There’s no room

No space to rent in this town

You’re out of luck

And the reason that you had to care

The traffic is stuck

And you’re not moving anywhere

You thought you’d found a friend

To take you out of this place

Someone you could lend a hand

In return for grace

It’s a beautiful day

Sky falls, you feel like

It’s a beautiful day

Don’t let it get away

You’re on the road

But you’ve got no destination

You’re in the mud

In the maze of her imagination

You love this town

Even if that doesn’t ring true

You’ve been all over

And it’s been all over you

It’s a beautiful day

Don’t let it get away

It’s a beautiful day

Touch me

Take me to that other place

Teach me

I know I’m not a hopeless case

See the world in green and blue

See China right in front of you

See the canyons broken by cloud

See the tuna fleets clearing the sea out

See the Bedouin fires at night

See the oil fields at first light

And see the bird with a leaf in her mouth

After the flood all the colors came out

It was a beautiful day

Don’t let it get away

Beautiful day

Touch me

Take me to that other place

Reach me

I know I’m not a hopeless case

What you don’t have you don’t need it now

What you don’t know you can feel it somehow

What you don’t have you don’t need it now

Don’t need it now

Was a beautiful day


B*stards.  Never could trust ’em in the first place.  They ought to be wiretapped or something.


Trapped in the Rubble

In the aftermath of the devastating earthquake in Haiti, Obama walked out of a National Security Council meeting and observed, “for a country and a people who are no strangers to hardship and suffering, this tragedy seems especially cruel and incomprehensible.”

Those words from the man at the top of America’s cruel and incomprehensible political system, from the guardian of America’s cruel and incomprehensible economic system, from the protector of America’s cruel and incomprehensible banking system must seem especially meaningless to the hundreds of millions of victims of America’s corporate wars, corporate exploitation, and corporate repression.  The devastation in Haiti, as tragic and terrible as it is, is minor compared to the devastation inflicted on a global scale, inflicted every minute of every day, inflicted on the poor and the powerless of every nation by the corporate masters of this country.  

No Richter Scale can measure their destructive impact, no words can convey the enormity of the hardship and suffering they inflict.  The death toll is in the millions, but there’s no media coverage of that catastrophe.  No one provides assistance to the victims, there are no relief efforts, there’s no help on the way for the survivors trapped in that rubble, they’re on their own . . .

We can see the corruption, we can hear the lies, we can feel the consequences closing in, we can taste the bitterness, we can smell the smoke as America burns, as the world burns, as the future itself burns.  Obama and the Democrats aren’t putting out the fire, they’re fanning the flames.  Whether that’s due to stupidity or complicity doesn’t really matter anymore.  Putting out the fire is all that matters now.  

Get ready to do that alone, because we won’t be getting any help from the Obama addicts. They overdosed on unreality long ago.  They took the poison from the poison stream, then floated out of here, floated out of reality into Obama Land, where the inhabitants see only what they want to see, where they hear only what they want to hear.  They run through the streets, with eyes cold and dead, under a black belly of cloud in the rain, in through a doorway, they give each other white golden pearls, stolen from the sea, they’re raging at “purity trolls”, they’re raging, and a storm blows up in their eyes whenever they’re confronted with the truth.    

They’re addicts.  Denial is their drug.  They’re stoned on it, they’re hooked on it, they smoke it, they inject it, they mainline it, they freebase it, whatever it takes to get baked.  They’re all dealers of denial, they’re all pushers of denial, they hook each other up, they’re wired on it, they’re all wired on it, scoring the next fix is all they care about.  Whatever the Big Man does or doesn’t do is just fine with them.


When All We’ve Got Is Hurt

The assault has been brutal.

Insurance industry flacks, raving RePugs, craven Blue Dogs and K Street hacks have been beating the hell out of health care reform for weeks.  Senator Jim DeMint (Orc) South Carolina is blasting it as National Socialism.  The Mighty Wurlitzer up there in the organ loft of the Bipartisan Church of Beltway Believers has been cranked up to full volume, the choir is piously singing Onward Centrist Soldiers, the congregation is rolling in the aisles, speaking in tongues, the holy saints of Blue Cross and CIGNA must be defended, the trumpets have sounded, the heathens are at the gates, the Capitalists of Christ are no longer going to tolerate the unjust slandering of his Good Samaritan health insurance providers.  Verily, the Prince of Profits has said unto them: those evil unhinged godless Leftists bent upon destroying the best health care system in the world must be slain and cast into the Lake of Fire.              

As Armageddon approaches, the immaculately centrist Gang of Six is offering some friendly advice to Obama. They’re saying what reciters of the Catechism of Centrism always say when a Democratic President needs to be reminded that elections only have consequences when RePugs win them . . .  

Bipartisanship is a temple,

It’s a higher law,

Bipartisanship is a temple,

It’s the higher law.

We’ve all heard their sermons, we’ve all heard them singing the praises of bipartisanship, we’ve all seen them telling Obama to sing along, telling him to join them in moderate fellowship, telling him to enter that Cathedral of Centrism and worship beside them.

Yeah.  We’ve all seen it.

They ask Obama to enter,

But then they make him crawl.

So American soldiers are still dying, the NSA is still spying, CIA drones are still flying, Big Pharma, the Lords of Drugs, Blue Cross hacks and CIGNA thugs are still lying.  We’re told we have to be patient while our wise and caring leaders decide what’s best for us, we’re told there must be compromise, we’re told we have to hold onto the healthcare we’ve got until a few drops of reform finally trickle down from on high later this year or maybe next year or the year after that.    

Well we can’t be holding on,

To what we’ve got,

When all we’ve got is hurt . . .


Wild Pony Party

Who’s Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses by U2

Photos courtesy of the BLM Image Gallery (Public Domain)