Tag: Satire

Obama, Lipton, To Seize World’s Teabags

WASHINGTON (FNS) – In a startling development related to the recent disruptions of town hall meetings, FNS is now able to confirm that the Obama Administration, with the assistance of Unilever Group and Queen Beatrix, both of the Netherlands, PepsiCo, Skull And Bones, and the Bilderberg Group, is unleashing a secret plot to dispatch fleets of unmarked aircraft and helicopters to prevent teabag protesters from having access to teabags.  

The goal of the plot: to disrupt protesters’ plans to save America from the destruction of our health care system.

FNS reporters have been following a trail of information that includes airport noise abatement records, classified documents, and the testimony of insiders, some of whom are now willing to be publicly identified.

We’ll begin our story by reporting on three events that occurred the evening of Friday, August 8th.

A Fake Consultant Exclusive: Political Robots Fail In Operational Service

It has been quite some time, Gentle Reader, since we addressed the issue of political robot design, but recent events have forced us to return to the subject once again.

As you undoubtedly are aware, three high profile ‘bots from Robotican™ Labs have recently experienced major failures.

It was originally thought that the problems were isolated to the Robotican™.1 Congressional Series of Devices…but it is now known that the failures also extend to the.2 Gubernatorial Series as well.

In today’s story we will examine what is known about these failures, how they may impact other devices in Political Service, and what solutions might be available to address these issues.

John Cusack put my review of War, Inc. on his MySpace blog!

I’m so stoked. John Cusack cross-posted my review of his movie War, Inc. from Progressive Blue to his MySpace blog after I sent him the link in a comment. Thanks, John. Just for that, I’m crossposting this like crazy.

Here’s the review:

Pony Party: Lobbyists for McCain

Billionaires for Bush is back: Join Lobbyists for McCain.

Some of you know that I am a huge fan of public art.  Street theater included.  The best street theater troupe that arose during the past 8 years, imho, is Billionaires for Bush.

Aaaaaand…they’re back!  They’ve renamed themselves Lobbyists for McCain but it’s the same group, now with even more biting video.  This first one is just a teaser:

The next one–it is so true that one could cry–is the best I’ve found:

This is an Open Thread.  Please do not wRECk the Pony Party!

Savoring a Green Onion

That is, truly enjoing the Onion‘s 3 July 2008 Green Issue: “Our All-Paper Salute to the Environment.”

Well-done satire provides a painful window on the soul of an issue.

And, the Onion specializes in that well-done satire.

This issue pulls together some top environmentally-oriented satire from the past decade. Lets take some bites of that green onion …

But, first, some related breaking news …

A Tribute To War

From one of my favorite radio artists, Joe Frank:

Here’s To War (5MB MP3 File)

[WARNING: Dark satire — not for the seriously-depressed or humor-impaired.]

If you like this piece, I encourage you to check out Joe’s website for more of his radio shows:


George “Global Warming Denier” Carlin !?!

This video is the rage among the Global Warming denial sect, as they pass it around and post it with great glee following Carlin’s death. Their RIP is a celebration that George was one of theirs.

You got people around you.

The country’s full of them right now, people walking around all day long, every minute of the day, worried about everything …

the greatest arrogance of them all, Save the Planet.  …

I’m getting tired of this shit.

Celebrate George “Global Warming Denier” Carlin!

Hold on a second now …  

McCain Camp Compares Obama to a Bond Movie Character

Crossposted from Daily Kos

It had to happen sooner or later.

In spite of John McCain being a technological Luddite with no apparent computer skills, the McCain Camp had to prove conclusively that their guy is hip and fully in tune with the American mainstream and pop culture.

What better way than to invoke the image of a movie character that many Americans are familiar with.  So… they compared Barack Obama to ‘Dr. No’ of the James Bond movies.

Does Obama welcome this comparison?  It isn’t as if Obama doesn’t have the flair for the dramatic, as he demonstrated prior to the Texas Primacaucus.  He’s an ‘Urban Cowboy’ himself!

Dr No vs

Dr. No and Barack Obama – coming soon to a theater near you

Hilarious screenshots of McCain golf gear “reviews”

You’ve probably heard that McCain is selling golf gear on his website.  Well, some zany crazy kids went into the “reviews” section and posted a bunch of “reviews”.  The webmaster deleted them in short order — but not before I got these hilarious screenshots:

click images to see full screen views

High Fuel Costs = Desperate Airlines

As aviation fuel prices continue to rise several air carriers have launched crash programs to search for alternatives and cut costs.

There were high hopes for one experimental program in which Jumbos were allowed to graze for their sustenance.

Grazer 2

The experiment started out extremely well and a sense of near euphoria set in as Wall Street began to smell green.

Your Penis Larger, with UPROUNDERS!

Hi, my name is Jeffrey Lieber and before I got started on the UPROUNDERS™ program my “certain part of the male anatomy” was mere inches long, but with the help of UPROUNDERS™ my “junk” now measures a full 22 inches, or almost TWO FULL FEET!

How did I do it… and how can YOU do it too?

Well let me show YOU how UPROUNDERS™ five step program works for EVERYONE…

Quit tearing the party apart!

I knew it would come to this one day, because one side was so stubborn and the other side was feeling rejected. Maybe this rift can be filled one day, but right now, there is only pain and hurt. Makes one wonder how it all came down to this.

That’s right, al-Qaida and Iran have irreconcilable differences, they are tearing their Axis of Evil apart.


The increasing enmity toward Iran is a notable change of rhetoric from al-Zawahri, who in the past rarely mentioned the country-apparently in a hopes he would be able to forge some sort of understanding with Tehran based on their common rivalry with the United States. Iran has long sought to distance itself from al-Qaida.  

“Al-Zawahri wanted to work with Iran, but he’s deeply disappointed that Iran has not cooperated with al-Qaida,” said Rohan Gunaratna, a terrorism expert and author of “Inside al-Qaida: The Global Network of Terror.”

So now, al-Zawahri “wants to appeal to the anti-Shiite, anti-Iran sentiments in the Arab and Muslim world,” said Gunaratna, head of the International Center for Political Violence and Terrorism Research in Singapore.

Al-Zawahri appeared intent on exploiting widespread worry in the Arab world over Iran’s influence, particularly in Iraq, to garner support for al-Qaida. At the same time, he sought to denigrate Iran’s ally Hezbollah, which has gained some popularity even among Sunnis in the region for its fight against Israel.

But in many of his answers, al-Zawahri went out of his way to criticize Iran. He said the Iraqi insurgent umbrella group led by al- Qaida, called the Islamic State of Iraq, is “the primary force opposing the Crusaders (the United States) and challenging Iranian ambitions” in Iraq.

Great, al-Zawahri plays the race card. Way to turn the Arabs against the Persians, asshole. This Jihad was suppose to be about ideas and policies, but here al-Zawahri goes back to the terrorism of old.

“Iran’s aim here is also clear-to cover up its involvement with America in invading the homes of Muslims in Afghanistan and Iraq,” he added. Iran cooperated with the United States in the 2001 U.S. assault on Afghanistan that toppled al-Qaida’s allies, the Taliban.

This campaign of dirty tricks has to end, you don’t go into Jihad as a people divided. You don’t see Iran bringing up Osama’s playboy youth or compassionate sane cleric.

Iran has never been in bed with America, while it is well know Osama was. Do you see Iran making obscure internet videos about that?

No. Because they are against tearing this party apart.

The rhetoric is a stark change for al-Zawahri, who in the past did not seek to exploit Shiite-Sunni tensions. When the former head of al- Qaida in Iraq, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, was waging a campaign of suicide bombings against Shiites in Iraq, al-Zawahri sent messages telling him to stop, fearing it would hurt al-Qaida’s image.

This just goes to show al-Zawahri will stop at nothing to win this thing. He will flipflop, he will lie and he will ruin other members of the Axis of Evil for his own entitlement.

This was suppose to be a different Jihad, a Jihad about ideas. About policy. A Jihad where fanatical Muslim could walk hand in hand with other fanatical Muslims, regardless of sects, setting off each other’s suicide belts, showing the world what a terrorist party united can do.

al-Zawahri has ruined that hope, which is why he is the real Great Satan.

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