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learning lessons

All high schools look the same don’t they?  That weird cheap tiling on the floor and cinderblock walls painted industrial beige.  I looked in the trophy case as I passed by, taking notice of years of proud football awards, basketball, plaques, pictures, memorials to accomplishments.  Posters all around.  Some hand made from students advertising upcoming events, a few supplied by companies or public interests.


I feel as if I’ve been waiting for a lot of things lately.  But mostly I’ve been waiting for my life to catch up to my head.  I’m always in that same state, but this year I’ve been particularly ambitious, so everything is moving much slower and faster than normal.  I’ve decided that I’m having …

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the difference

Here’s a short little ditty for your consideration…

My youngest sister once asked my mom what the difference between a republican and a democrat was.

she answered with this story…

writing in the raw: poetry and dreaming

( – promoted by pfiore8) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ frantically felt for my throat….breathing sigh of relief ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I put my head down and closed my eyes everything was real quite and clear I ran over to him it was warm and clear thousands of stars ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ shaking and broken pathetic and hurt met you at …

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Being social…..

How doth the little crocodile

Improve his shining tail,

And pour the waters of the Nile

On every golden scale!

How cheerfully he seems to grin,

How neatly he spreads his claws,

And welcomes little fishes in,

With gently smiling jaws!

Writing is complicated for me, blogging is a disaster.  I’m very socially adept in person and actually quite outgoing when I feel like it.  People usually seem to like me despite my severely antisocial tendencies and sarcastic speech impediment….but online I’m shy, avoidant, and unsure of myself.  From reading people’s comments it seems it’s usually the other way around.  Most interact online more boldly and open than they would in person.  I guess I just happen to fall on the opposite side of things.  I’m not really concerned about how I’m perceived in person for a multitude of reasons…but for one, there is no record of myself floating around (well…) and no one I’ve known has time stamped transcripts of every conversation I’ve ever held with them….not to mention the silent audience…the whole idea quite frankly makes me uncomfortable and paranoid.

DC protest pictures

I have an Albert Einstein daily quote gadget on my iGoogle page…

~ The release of atomic power has changed everything except our way of thinking … the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker. ~

I have too much and too little to say and I’ve been trying since I got home to say both….

It’s not really going well…so instead here are some pictures….


Boogeymen and amputations

There’s a haunted mansion ride at the amusement park near my family’s house.  I used to be terrified, more than anything else in my life of opening my eyes inside this haunted mansion.  I would cry and cling to whoever was riding with me while pictures of horrific monsters and ghosts played in my head.  One time when my grandmother rode with me she made me open my eyes and promised it would be ok.  She held my hand and promised.  So between the tears and stubborn cries I finally opened my eyes.  I saw what I had been fearing the whole time.  And it was nothing.  Just an old house filled with cheap pop-ups and chipped paint set to music.  

I felt foolish.

She told me that sometimes what we create in our imagination is scarier than the truth.  I used to believe that.  


S : 32.065

Smells like rotten eggs, that’s how you can tell if you have it on your hands or not.  

Burnt match heads and chewed fingernails smell like sulfur too.

One of the times my family drove cross country we stopped at Yellowstone national park.  Besides the geysers I remember most vividly the sulfur pits.  The smell and heat and fumes bubbling up out of the mud.  It was like walking on a distant planet.  There were also roaming buffalo (or bison?), and like all roaming and free animals they do what they please.  One in particular followed a woman to an outhouse and just stood there.  All 900 lbs (according to Oregon Trail) just hanging out in front of the outhouse door.  She started screaming and park rangers had to rescue her from the harmless immobile buffalo by yelling at it and wishing it would move.  I didn’t really think buffalo hung around sulfur pits.  

Maybe they just did it for the laughs.  

on love and leaving





Random thoughts are this way







Taking pills

There are lots of drugs I’ve found enjoyable and some I would recommend (more on that at a later date..) but I never trusted pills or heroin. I knew pill heads in school. They were just as bad if not worse than junkies. Stealing medication by the bag fulls, offering randomly unnamed pills of various …

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