Republican Debate 5: Open Thread

I really can’t stand to watch it (on CNN if you have a stronger stomach than I do). While the buzz has been all about Cruz and Rubio, they have only improved their polls relative to the dismal numbers they had before. The Donald is showing over 40% nationally and in most state polls (the only place he’s in any particular danger of finishing 2nd is Iowa where the evangelical vote is strong and there he’s neck and neck with Cruz). The Republican establishment and their corrupt complicit cronies in the legacy Media are either frightened by The Donald or bored because there is no horserace worth mentioning, just manufactured hype for sub par performances and flavor of the month candidates who are not Trump.

And I wish I could feel that anything worth reporting is going to emerge but obviously nothing The Donald can say is going to hurt him very much and all the rest of them are going to parrot the crazy policies only with less showmanship. There’s not a dimes worth of difference between them and Trump except in the cases where they’re even more reprehensible than he is.

Anyway, tune in if you want to. I’ll root around and try and find some ‘tween comedies or something.

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  1. Vent Hole

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 19:58

    The warm up act for the big event are the “bottom feeders”

    Former senator Rick Santorum

    Former New York governor George Pataki

    Mike Huckabee, former governor of Arkansas and media personality

    South Carolina senator Lindsey Graham

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 20:02

    Matt Taibbi’s Official GOP Debate Drinking Game Rules, Pt. 5

    The rules:

    DRINK AFTER EVERY VIOLATION OF:

    1. The doctor’s note rule: Self-explanatory. Drink after any riffing on Trump’s latest stunt.

    2. The nuke ’em till they glow rule: Drink after any promise to “carpet bomb” the Middle East, or after any attempt to one-up Ted Cruz’s recent comments about how, “I don’t know if sand can glow in the dark, but we’re going to find out.”

    3. The Obama won’t say “terrorism” rule: Candidate complains that the president is afraid to use the words “radical Islam” or “Islamic terrorism.”

    4. The climate change denial rule: Complaint about the Paris climate change agreement. Shotgun a beer if it comes with a mention of how the nice local weather renders climate change talk meaningless.

    5. The War on Christmas rule: Mention of “red cups,” nativity controversies, etc.

    6. The Reince Priebus rule: Mention of a brokered convention or use of the phrase “Let the people decide” in a discussion of RNC/Reince Priebus controversy. Double shot if the latter’s name pronounced incorrectly.

    7. The George Lucas rule: Gratuitous mention of Star Wars. Double shot if it comes with an impersonation or a sound effect (e.g., Cruz does a Yoda voice while threatening ISIS).

    8. The I’m just a simple caveman rule: A candidate mentions that he/she is not a scientist, or generally derides higher education before proceeding to make a “common sense” point.

    9. The wet blanket rule: Attempt by Kasich to implore his fellow candidates to be more realistic, followed by boos/catcalls from the audience.

    10. The Hitler had some really good ideas rule: Salutary mention of Japanese internment, religious registries or other similar policies.

    11. The I don’t just believe in the American dream, I’m a product of it rule: Anyone talks about how they are the son/daughter/husband/wife of a humble bartender/maid/tow truck driver/whatever because dreams and opportunity.

    12. The good guy with a gun rule: Self-explanatory.

    13. The empty God platitudes rule: An anti gun-control candidate extends “thoughts and prayers” to the victims of Paris, San Bernardino or whatever other mass shooting we’ll have in the next ten minutes.

    14. The we’re not racist rule: A candidate complains that people with “traditional values” are being accused of being bigots. Double shot if it’s Rubio.

    15. The Carly, interrupted rule: Carly Fiorina interrupts someone and/or uses a bogus statistic. Double shot if it’s that “73,000-page tax code” line she continues to send out there at every opportunity.

    THE EVERGREEN RULES

    ALWAYS drink, in every debate, when:

    16. Trump brags about how much money he makes.

    17. Anyone says, “I’m the only one on this stage who…”

    18. Someone says, “Any one of us onstage is better than Hillary Clinton…”

    19. The crowd breaks into uncomfortable applause at a racist/sexist statement.

    20. Any candidate evokes Nazis, the Gestapo, Neville Chamberlain, concentration camps, etc.

    21. Anyone force-feeds an Israel reference into a question where it doesn’t belong. Also known as the Ann Coulter rule.

    22. Anyone pledges to “take our country back.”

    23. The Jim Webb rule: Candidate complains about not getting enough time.

    24. Any candidate illustrates the virtue of one of his/her positions by pointing out how not PC it is.

    25. Someone invokes St. Reagan. Beware, people, this is an every time rule again.

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 21:44

    Thank he FSM for Twitter and other bloggers with stronger stomachs who are watching this. From John Amato at Crooks and Liars, the obvious anagram Reince Preibus was the warm up act for the main event and said this with a straight face

    What does the Republican National Committee do? a competant national party that has its act together on the ground and with dtata. Working in all communities, in black communities, Hispanic communities, Asian communities and being far better than we were in 2012. This is a unifying message…

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 23:08

    Trump’s doctor is a gastroenterologist and the letter was written on Trump stationary

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 23:12

    This was funny, just ignore the comment thread

    http://www.mediaite.com/online/meet-harold-bornstein-personal-physician-to-donald-trump/

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 23:15

    Facts don’t matter to Trump supporters nor does the Constitution

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 23:36

    Larry! Larry! LARRY!!!

    • TMC on December 15, 2015 at 23:48

    An elf got Santa on the no-fly list

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