Suffering under a whopping .82 inches of snow and frigid 34 degree temperatures (hey, with the wind chill it feels like 28!), in an annual celebration of prospective greed and scandal, people in Stamford are happy that the 21st Big Balloon Parade happened last Sunday under clear, blue 60 degree skies.
In another ‘in your face’ move, this year the organizers sported a full 16 balloons! This proves that the Finance/Insurance/Real Estate sector of egregious ass hats (sorry, I meant assets) has eclipsed the retail minions of the consumer class who are expected to volunteer with no wages to shepherd giant gas bags through the canyons of what we call “the City” but which is really a $24 worth of beads, trinkets, and iron ax heads island on what should be their day off which can merely muster the same with 33 lesser ‘Novelty’ Ballons to cover it’s naked shame.
All hail Capitalism!
I have a lovely Nutmeg to sell you-
The sobriquet, the Nutmeg State, is applied to Connecticut because its early inhabitants had the reputation of being so ingenious and shrewd that they were able to make and sell wooden nutmegs.
We had Babar & Badou, Big Bird, Billy Blazes, Clifford the Big Red Dog, Cookie Monster, Elmo, Fred Flinstone, Kermit (the Frog), The Lorax (making an ironic appearance), Maiden London (which, although sponsored by Richard Branson and Virgin did not deploy its atmospheric braking system too early and explode in a fireball, much to spectator’s disappointment), Mr. Potato Head, Paddington Bear, Popeye, a generic Smurf (but really, aren’t the all generic except for Papa, Brainy, and Smurfette?), and two characters from Yo Gabba Gabba, Foofa and Plex, whom I can only guess are much more popular in Scotland than they are here (being UBS sponsored and all).
We also had 10 bands and 23 ‘Marching Units’. Way to go Kim Jong-un. Sorry you missed it.
In a shameless bit of mockery and copyright infringment today’s 90th Macy’s Parade will feature Paddington, Pikachu, the Pillsbury Doughboy, the Red Mighty Morphin Power Ranger, Skylanders’ Eruptor, Thomas the Tank Engine, Finn & Jake, Diary of A Wimpy Kid, The Elf on the Shelf, Hello Kitty, Papa Smurf, Ronald McDonald, Snoopy and Woodstock, Spider-Man, SpongeBob SquarePants, and Toothless of How to Train Your Dragon.
CBS is positioned uptown at Times’ Square and will see everything first. NBC is at 33rd Street and will fill the first 30 minutes of it’s 9 am ET broadcast with show tunes and celebrities. If you have a favorite band that garnered an invitation look quick, they won’t be on long