Why I’ll Be Voting Democratic In 2012

(9 am. – promoted by ek hornbeck)

1. Because I like cheese.  

I suspect Democrats eat more cheese than republicans do. Republicans probably prefer chicken fried steak (whatever that is) , and they came up with the phrase ‘cheese eating surrender monkey’ –besmirching cheese by association with the socialist French.

2. Because it feels better somehow, when Democrats kill off social security, and medicare, and through us all in jail for not paying our mandated insurance premiums, than when Republicans do it.

3. Because I like Ronald Reagan a whole bunch, and Obama likes him too, so it’s all good. I especially liked the bit where Reagans’ goons raped and killed nuns in Central America–I’m sure glad Obama is funding lots of School Of The America’s goons to do the same thing all over. (why limit the fun to Central America?)

4. Trickle down economics: Love It ! (See #3 above)

5. Endless wars? I’ve come to love these now. (Not so much in 2008)

6. Nuclear Power: Safe, clean, energy. (what I can’t see, can’t kill me, or anyone else)

7. Drone Attacks against anyone muslim!! In any country. Anywhere. Take that you f’ing  f*ckers !!

And THAT !! And THAT !!!!!

8.  JOBS! Lots of ’em. If you’re a banker, stock trader, a military contractor, a drone pilot, or an undertaker in another country (now that’s some  REAL foreign aid–get rid of those damn foreigners before they can even think about coming here and taking MY damn job at Burger King! Yeah!)

9. The TSA. Luv gettin’ groped. Luv getting nuked too. (see #6 above)

10. Offshore oil drilling. Good stuff, that. And putting BP in total charge of the GOM (that’s military speak for ‘Gulf of Oil’) , and of the EPA, Coast Guard, and a whole bunch of other agencies I can’t remember the names of, was DAMN brilliant.  

14 comments

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  1. It would change my vote the other way, if I’m all wrong about the cheese thing.  

    • Xanthe on July 13, 2011 at 15:14

    the good news is that they could be used here against the dirty fu***** hippies that ruin our glorious country, not to mention the old, infirm, poor, and not good looking.

    • on July 14, 2011 at 12:19

    This is a great post. you got cheap shoes online  .I like cheap designer shoes as well give you designer shoes outlet  

    • banger on July 14, 2011 at 16:35

    The Democratic Party at least appears to stand between us and chaos. Chaos can be good but for me I’d like to have more time to prepare for the neo-feudal future.

    Obama and the Democrats buy us time to still live in some semblance of civilization–I still like civilization for all its faults and I need the time to help build alternative structures. The Republicans are, generally speaking, obsessed with sheer destruction based on their revulsion for the modernist project–they’d rather devolve into some brutal Hobbesian war of all against all than face the real challenges of this time in history.

  2. Obama really cut the cheese, didn’t he?  

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