There’s oil on my pinche beach.

( – promoted by buhdydharma )

Good lord BP, do you have any idea who you are fucking with here? Why is there oil on my pinche beach? Do you not understand the pain, both in reputation and pocketbook, that is coming your way?

You dare spill oil on my pinche beach!

Sure, we’re looking into it as we speak, it might be our normal crop of tarball from the ridge, but that shit is usually the size of a tarball, and this shit is in pebble form. I swear to Elohay that if there is Corexit in these pebbles, you are going down.

Hard.

BP, you are fucking with people who invented Paultards, got the dumbest son of bitch in America elected President and did more for international trade than Nantucket circa 1835. I mean fuck, We Started TEXAS, and your incompetence has brought oil to our beach? Do you not understand what we are capable of when we get pissed off?

Know why the beach is undeveloped? Because it was a fucking natural wonder. Yes, you took a big ol’ corporate shit where no less than 30 endangered animals hang out. You are about to kill more whales, turtles and dolphins than a generation of Japanese fishermen. For this, you will pay.

Oh yes, you will pay.

BP, your stockholders and your corporate board better fucking pray, get down on your knees and beg like the fucking dogs you are that there is no Corexit in this oil.

Because I wasn’t above making the lives of the leaders of the WTO hell for a bit, and they make you look like street punks.

And I got a lot of friends, across the spectrum, who know when I get pissed, I get funny, and some say amusing, except for my target, who I will make cry like a little bitch in the darkness of the night.

Tests are coming back Friday.

Pray BP, pray for your ever-loving souls that there is no Corexit in the oil that showed up on my pinche beach.

Because if there is, this shit is on, and I will be bringing the full pinche and my hordes, from Texas to LA to NYC, we will be there to make sure you never ever “have your life back.”

Not until your stock value is worth less than the shit you crapped on my pinche beach and each and every person who had a decision on this well is branded as the outcast of humanity and refused even a glance from polite society.

One drop of corexit, and this shit is on.

Pray mother fuckers, pray.

You will know me by the trail of meta.

– Pinche  

29 comments

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    • Edger on July 7, 2010 at 7:37 pm

    Hordes of locusts. Etcetera..

  1. Hayward picking boot spurs out of his …..

  2. Hooo boy!  This morning there was a story (find your own link) that BP’s current mouthpiece said they will have the “relief well” running by 7/29.  Way ahead of schedule.  Then they went into “controlling expectations mode.”

    What’s the big f*cking magic with 7/29?  That’s the date on which they are announcing their earnings and having a stockholders meeting.

    What a bunch of douchebags.  Each of the stockholders should write me a check equal to the present “value” of their stock.  I’ll distribute it to people all across the gulf.    

  3. Might’ve known there was a “monetary motive” connected with that date!  

    Thank you for that!

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