Open Thread: in which I whine about “winter” cold

Gawd I hate cold! Hate it hate it hate hate it. I am a tropical girl.

Photobucket

I’ll proceed with my Winter Whine is a minute, but for penance, I am also going to link you to one little useful essay over at FDL re dry skin issues/remedies. It’s one of the best I’ve ever seen (and Ive read a lot of ’em!)

There. Okay, now… listen. These are several words that are just not in my vocabulary, or else they have a different definition than you might have:

Garage.

Basement.

Furnace.

Garage: The garage is where you store your lawn tools & equipment, your croquet set and stuff like that. Also has your washer/dryer. What? You put your car in yours?! WHY in heaven’s name would anyone do that? Where do you store all your shit?!

Basement: What’s that? Saw my first ever basement somewhere around age 15, visiting relatives in Chicago.

Furnace: Wow, really, what’s that? How does that work? I honestly don’t know. You think I’m kidding. Here is what’s keeping me and mine warm right now:

Photobucket

Snow: I only have one word for snow. It is “snow“.

Weatherize (one’s house): We have a really great Oak Tree in back and a lovely Magnolia on the west side, both provide welcome shade in the summer and help deflect the heat. We really need to do weather-stripping and all that b/c this house is soooo drafty. Oh yeah… that reminds me…

Mud Room: First time I saw such a thing, I was visiting someone in St. Louis MO and it was summer. I couldn’t understand why they had this nice little porch like that all glassed in instead of screens.

Also missing: wool. long johns. down comforter. legwarmers (actually do own some of those! lol) insulation. storm door

Okay, you get the idea. Let’s take this another direction.

Florida Room:  Anyone know? How ’bout jalousie windows? They are what makes your Florida Room great.

Photobucket

The thing is… we just don’t get that cold that often (see chart here) to justify spending any money on these wintery things. So, during those few days per year when the mercury slides, we suffer.

Suffering is part of the human condition, no? ugh.

Key West anyone?

Photobucket

20 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. on a low budget and short term basis of course.

    That doesn’t involve air travel.

    Photobucket

  2. I swear by them – they are not as itchy and bulky as regular thermals but do the job great!

    About 15 bucks a piece but well worth it.

    Or lots of sex…

  3. with the wind chill factor here in LA.  Heh.  

    Lotsa blankets, hot cocoa with a little dash of jack daniels,  and put a coupla printouts of the Senate HC bill in your fireplace and light ’em up.

  4. I bet you guys dont have this on your local TV News programs either. The three P’s = plant, pets, and pipes. Protect them.

    I shouldnt laugh I know. This is really especially terrible for homeless folks. Local News also saying that City and County is making special note that libraries etc are open for people who lack adequate heat in their homes. Or lack of homes. 🙁

    • quince on January 8, 2010 at 17:40

    The last time we got snow flurries here was 82 or 83, I forget which.

    Unfrickinbelievable! And of course, I hear the “global warming, hah!” comments from my neighbor. Grumble. I calmly point out that this is EXACTLY what climate change models predict. More extremes in both seasons with a rising yearly average temperature…  

    • TMC on January 8, 2010 at 18:45

    I don’t care if the oceans are rising, I’ll find one still above sea level. This was one of the greatest place to just swim and snorkel in the whole world.

    Photobucket

    The hell with returning to Paris, the winters suck. I take French Polynesia and a shack on the beach.

    • quince on January 8, 2010 at 20:08

    Key West, Florida — the southernmost point in the continental United States — hit a 131-year low of 47 degrees Thursday and the forecast promised more of the same as icy cold swept across the Southeast.

    link

Comments have been disabled.