A Stars Hollow Gazette
So you remember Dana Milbank, Village Idiot?
Ben Bernanke, Fed Chairman and Newly Minted Radical
By Dana Milbank
Thursday, February 19, 2009; Page A03
“Since Ben Bernanke became chairman of the Federal Reserve two years ago,” USA Today’s Donna Leinwand told the crowd at the National Press Club, “the S&P index has declined 35 percent, unemployment rose to 7.6 percent, the highest rate since 1992, and the economy has sunk into a deep recession.”
Ha. Ha. Ha.
History will no doubt judge Bernanke as the man left holding the bag when maestro Alan Greenspan left the Fed. But the economic collapse seems to have had a salutary effect on Bernanke: The academic known for his bland answers and brown socks has been liberated in both word and deed. This student of the Great Depression has taken extreme and unprecedented actions to avert a modern-day sequel, and he’s taken the Fed chairman’s lexicon well beyond basis points and LIBOR and M1 and M2.
Ouch. That’s gonna leave a mark.
But Dana goes on to mumble about nationalization–
President Obama over the weekend said a “good argument” could be made for Sweden’s temporary nationalization of banks. And no less a free-market authority than Greenspan, in an interview with the Financial Times this week, said “it may be necessary to temporarily nationalize some banks,” calling this the “least bad solution” to the financial crisis.
When Bernanke was asked at lunch about his predecessor’s sentiments, he voiced no opposition to the idea. While discouraging government ownership of banks “for a protracted period,” he offered no such objection to short-term nationalization. “Whatever actions may need to be taken, at one point or another, I think there’s a very strong commitment, on the part of the administration, to try to return banks or keep banks private or return them to private hands as quickly as possible,” he said.
Well isn’t that interesting.
|Mønti Pythøn ik den Hølie Gräilen
|Wi nøt trei a høliday in Sweden this yër?
|The wøndërful telephøne system
|And mäni interesting furry animals
|The Characters and incidents portrayed and the names used are fictitious and any similarity to the names, characters, or history of any person is entirely accidental and unintentional.
|Signed RICHARD M. NIXON
|Including the majestik møøse
|A Møøse once bit my sister…
|No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge – her brother-in-law – an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: “The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist”, “Fillings of Passion”, “The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink”…
We apologise for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.
|Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti…
We apologise again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.
|Møøse trained by YUTTE HERMSGERVØRDENBRØTBØRDA
|Special Møøse Effects OLAF PROT
|Møøse Costumes SIGGI CHURCHILL
|Møøse Choreographed by HORST PROT III
|Miss Taylor’s Møøses by HENGST DOUGLAS-HOME
|Møøse trained to mix concrete and sign complicated insurance forms by JURGEN WIGG
|Møøses’ noses wiped by BJØRN IRKESTØM-SLATER WALKER
|Large møøse on the left hand side of the screen in the third scene from the end, given a thorough grounding in Latin, French and “O” Level Geography by BO BENN
|Suggestive poses for the Møøse suggested by VIC ROTTER
|Antler-care by LIV THATCHER
The directors of the firm hired to continue the credits after the other people had been sacked, wish it to be known that they have just been sacked.
The credits have been completed in an entirely different style at great expense and at the last minute.