A Real Monster Never Quail’s when there is Evil to be Done

(9 am. – promoted by ek hornbeck)

Yeah, we all know about Deputy President Dick’s recent discussions with the media, and also Fox News, to help along the “Wurst President Ever” and his legacy.  (The spelling of “Wurst” is correct since the neo-cons all know that we know that they know that they are all a bunch of weenies and they are trying to sell a different kind of weenie to the not-so-observant remainder of the American people).  

Yet, even with all of Vlad Cheney’s attempts to throw everyone in the entire world under the 18 wheeler, other than his cronies of course, he is still considered to be at best contemptible and at worst himself.

The people in America?  They don’t like Deputy Dick.  Shall we have a look?

From CNN:

A new national poll suggests that almost a quarter of Americans think that Dick Cheney is the worst vice president in American history.

Twenty-three percent of those questioned in a CNN/Opinion Research Corporation survey released Monday say that Cheney is the country’s worst vice president, when compared with his predecessors.

Note that I mentioned the not-so-observant remainder of the American people in my comment above?  I write that since it is obvious that if you have been paying attention to anything other than your personal navel lint in the last eight years, “almost a quarter of Americans” seems a bit anemic considering their overall disdain for our current growling menace of a Deputy President.

Moving forward however, we do find that another 41% of Americans are not just dealing with contemplating the astrological implications of being born with innies or outies, but have taken some notice of the Duke of Nuke (Iran).

An additional 41 percent feel that Cheney is a poor vice president, with 34 percent rating him a good number two.

Then again, 34% definitely are far more into their:

• Alcohol

• Drugs

• B.B. Lint (no relation to B.B. King)

• Wingnuttery

than the average American.  I’m guessing that it is mostly wingnuttery and B.B. Lint that is skewing this number.  Someone call Nate and get him on this, STAT!

Only one percent of those polled say that Cheney is the best vice president in U.S. history.

No comment.

“On the Sunday talk shows, Cheney took on the job of making the affirmative case for the Bush legacy,” said Keating Holland, CNN polling director. “But the messenger may be getting in the way of the message.”

No, really!  You mean an arrogant bastard with the life expectancy of forever (keep sending those certified virgin kittens and chipmunks, OK, wingnuts?)  if he keeps sucking the life from certified virgin kittens and chipmunks, could possibly get in the way of an affirmative message regarding the BUSH Administration?

Well then.  Paint my asshole blue and call me Arvin!  How could we have EVAR predicted that kinda ineptness from Vlad?  (Guantanamo, Rendition, Drunkenly Shooting Caged Animals, Drunkenly Shooting Drunken Fellow Shooters, Torture, using the Constitution as Asswipe, sucking life from Kitten &, Chipmunks, etc.).

OK, we could have predicted it.  In fact we did.  See the Internet, circa 2001 – 2008.  Google “Fuck Up VP”.

On Fox News this past Sunday, Vlad Cheney spouted his usual arrogant Bullshit.  This went over very well with the MSM and the WMSUM (wingnut make shit up media – see Townhall.com).

What they didn’t show you was the end of the interview.  A small brown bird from Kenedy County, Texas walked into the studio and flew directly up Vlad’s nose (Cheney now knows the meaning of “everything is bigger in Texas).  The small brown bird was wearing garlic around its neck, and this caused Cheney’s head to explode.

The small brown bird’s name was Brownie.  His brothers, Darrell and Darrell, were victims of the VP’s infamous hunt back in February, 2006, when Vlad drunkenly shot his drunken hunting partner, Harry Whittington in the face while hunting, er, quail.  Harry, as not reported previously, while clutching his bird-shot-bleeding-mug, fell over and squashed both of Brownie’s brothers to their death.  

Fox News drunken anchor, Britt Hume at once emptied the gratis bottles of certified virgin kitten and chipmunk blood that they keep on ice at the Fox Studios directly on the VP’s stumpy neck.  

Unfortunately for America, the World and The UNIVERSE, his head grew back.  Again.

Hell of a try, Brownie.  

1 comments

    • brobin on December 23, 2008 at 01:11
      Author

    They just quail when it comes to keeping certified kitten and baby chipmunk blood in their freezers!

    Gah!

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