(8 am. – promoted by ek hornbeck)
Happy Celtic New Year! (1) aka Samhain or Oiche Shamhna! A time for
fondly remembering those who have crossed over before us. And here’s a
little secret: if you set an extra place at the table and whisper the
names of your dead loved ones tonight, they’ll come calling and sit
down to dinner with you. So make sure you don’t accidentally whisper
the names of those relatives you hated when they were alive, or
you’re stuck with them for the evening.
You’ll be wanting a rousing good tale to share around the fireplace
with your guests (both the living and the biologically-challenged).
Nothing’s finer than the tale of the Second Battle of Maigh Tuireadh
[“Moy Toorah”], which took place on Samhain, in which the children of
the goddess Danu fought a desperate battle against the invading
This tale has it all: a hunky hero with superpowers named Lugh(2); a
god called The Dagda doin’ sexy times with an Irish valkyrie called
The Morrigan(3); and even a giant Cyclops with a laser-beam eye! Fun
for the whole family.
Y’all are on your own for a booze selection to go with your
festivities. Crusty’s teeing up a dry Manhattan. Message to the
biologically-challenged who are thinking of stopping by Chez Crusty
(1) technically it’s “year end”, not “new year”. When our modern year
ends at 11:59:59 on 12/31, our new year starts immediately. When the
Celtic year ended at Samhain, the new year didn’t start until Beltaine
in May. I’m still trying to sort out how that worked.
(2) When Lugh went against the Fomori cyclops Balor, he struck out
Balor’s laser-beam eye, which flew out of Balor’s head and bounced
around the battlefield, slaying many of Balor’s own men with its
uncontrolled blasts of fire. The first recorded “friendly-fire”
3. They weren’t just having a godly good time here; the Dagda was
trying (successfully) to persuade The Morrigan to reveal the Formori
battle plans. Why was The Morrigan, who was a warrior woman and one
tough cookie after all, willing to sell out the Formori for a romp in
the hay with The Dagda? Well, tradition teaches us that The Dagda,
like Sheriff Bart, was, umm, “gifted in certain areas.” After having a
rollicking good time with The Morrigan, the Dagda knocked off an
enormous cauldron of thick stew, gave a heroic belch, scratched his
arse, and charged into the battle, where his enormous battle club laid
waste to many of the Fomori. All in a normal day’s work for The Dagda,
apparently. Now THAT is a god worth worshiping!