Pony Paltry-Judge Dread

Due to having to make a cash deposit in person to a certain bank account in a certain place,  ms. moneysmith was not able to spend the incredible amount of time and effort typically on display in her Pony Parties.  Since she has such high standards, and was not willing to post anything of lesser excellence, she convinced me to do one, since few would be surprised or dismayed if I put out crap, me having assiduously cultivated an aura of low expectations.  Her words of wisdom to me: nocatz, nobody gives a flying fuck.   Let’s hope her wonderfull-sweetiepie-lambikins self will be able to at least stop in to say hello.  So,

take a shower

https://www.wildhorsefeathers….

slip into something comfortable

https://www.wildhorsefeathers….

make yourself a drink

https://www.wildhorsefeathers….

?????????

https://www.wildhorsefeathers….

and go read the Front Page, and Recommended and Recent Essays….or better yet, go back to the beginning of docudharma and start there….

https://www.docudharma.com/show…

All of the shallow, frivolous and really hot ponies, please join me for a trot through another exclusive, graminoid-dominated, docudharma pasture : Incognito

  There are thousands of stories in the Naked Desert, and then there’s this:

One mild autumn afternoon at about 1:30 the phone rings, ( this was when I was still usually answering the phone).  

        “Hello, Generic Southwestern Riparian Area, nocatz speaking.”

A femal voice,

“How late are you open?”

“Until four.”

“Hmmmmm, I’m not sure we can make it by then, do you think you could stay open a little later?”

“Well, ma’am, a lot of people ask to stay late or come

early, and we really can’t start making exceptions.”

“Well, I have a special friend visiting and it would be nice for him to see the sanctuary and walk around a bit.”

“I can appreciate that, but like I said…..”

“Would it help if I told you that my friend is Chief Justice Rehnquist.?

“Hah, hah, hah, hah, that’s great.   Ma’am, I’ve heard some

good ones , but that’s the best.   Usually it’s just that they’re best friends with the State Director or a Board member.”

“Well, it is him.  Do you think you could stay open a little later?”

“I’ll tell you what, that’s such a great line, that even if it isn’t him, you deserve some special treatment, so, yes, come on

down, and I’ll stay and let you in.”

“Thank you, we’ll be there as soon as we can.  Also, don’t tell any one, or make a big deal out of it, he just wants to be anonymous.”

“Uh, well, I think I should tell my boss. ”

“Yes,  that’ll be okay.”

Clearly she BELIEVES her friend is the Chief Justice.  Is she crazy?  Is she dangerous?  Will they ever find my body?  I’d better tell someone what’s going on.  I call Jerry  up at the managers house, he’s meeting with Karen, one of the Program Directors from the big city office.  A lawyer.

“You’re gonna love this one……..”  

At about 3:30 we gather in the office to speculate. After some initial skepticism, Jerry and Karen slowly join  the ranks of people (i.e. me) believing it COULD BE TRUE.  She recalls that Rehnquist has a little winter seminar at the U.of A., so it’s possible he is at least in the State.   She vacillates between pants-peeing-awe and wanting to argue with him.  

“I don’t agree with a lot of his rulings, but it’s the FUCKING CHIEF JUSTICE!”

Regretting that she’s here, I’m suddenly  feeling protective of my new pal’s space.

“Relax Karen, they don’t want us to make a big deal out of it.”

“Yeah, I know, but it’s THE FUCKING CHIEF JUSTICE.”

“Maybe.  It could just be some nut, or an obsessed birder.”

All other visitors have gone.  About a quarter-to-four, a modest late-model Cadillac pulls into the lot.    A petite older woman and a large, blotchy,  nearly bald man get out.  He puts on one of those giant floppy canvas hats and they head to the building.

“It’s him.”

“Sure looks like him.”

“He looks ridiculous in that hat.”

Feeling uncharacteristically host-like, I approach to greet them.

“Hello.  Welcome.”

“You must be Ed.   Thank you for staying open for us.  I’m Lucille,  (actually, I have no idea what her name really was)  and this is my friend Bill.”

(Bill?  You’re gonna introduce him as Bill?  )

Shaking hands,  “Hello, uh, Bill, nice to meet you.  Welcome to our little Sanctuary.”

This is ridiculous.   It’s the fucking Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.

He mumbles  something vaguely cordial, can’t remember exactly what.   I’m staring at him.  I can’t get over how ridiculous he looks in that hat.  We go through the other introductions, and he’s very gracious and patient as Karen starts babbling like an undergraduate.   She can’t call him ‘Bill’.   She’s onto something like…  

“Mr. Chief Justice Your Honor Sir, I’d just like to say that I’m a lawyer and blahblahblahblah……….”

then pulls out a new Sanctuary-logo cap and presents it to him as though it were something rare and valuable.    

“………….and in addition blahblahblah……..”

Maybe beginning to sense the rising discomfort level via the stares Jerry and I were giving, she manages to shut the fuck up so they could go for their walk.  They stroll out into the Sanctuary, and it starts,

“Why isn’t there Secret Service with him?”

“Maybe it’s not him.”

“Oh, it’s him.”

“What if something happens?”

“What if he has a heart attack?”

“What if a cottonwood blows over and crushes him?”

“Why doesn’t he have Secret Service.  Should we be security?  Follow them?”

“Who was the woman?”

“Is he married?”

“Don’t know.”

“It’s the fucking Chief Justice.”

We all feel obliged to wait,  scanning the hills around us looking for snipers.   After about forty-five minutes we can see the two of them returning through the bare trees along the railroad berm trail.  Feeling confident that he’ll get off the property without getting hit by a bus, Karen and I leave,  Jerry lets them out.  

The buzz in town the next day was that they had eaten dinner in a local restaurant.  It was fun to be casual about the whole thing,

“What?  You mean Bill?  Yeah, they came for a walk.

Seems like a regular guy.”

The events related above took place before this:

2000 pres. motorcade

teh Supremes