“It’s good to be back in Iraq,” Cheney said…
Just a quick recap of the history of the 21st Century, for any of you who may have made the incredibly wise decision to spend this century under a rock.
An American President gets a blowjob, $40 million is spent to investigate said blowjob, said President impeached.
Americans, shocked!, jerk their knees at this sexual horror and vote for an incompetent, corrupt, lying idiot in great enough numbers to allow the Republican dirty tricks machine and old boy network to steal the election. Whom, it also turns out….shockingly enough given the Republicans record on this sort of thing…is a War Monger and ultimately, a War Criminal.
A bunch of Saudis based in Afghanistan kill 3000 Americans, AND destroy valuable private property! Americans, under a War Mongering Republican President and a batshit insane paranoiac, Machiavellian, Vice President who had obviously closely studied the history of Fascism and taken it to heart…..respond to the Saudi/Afghan attack by ……..invading Iraq. It is PURE coincidence that these two oil men happen to preemptively invade a sovereign nation that had nothing to do with the attacks on Americans but that just happens to be the weakest nation that has the largest oil reserves. Pure coincidence, really. The fact that they manufactured and twisted every shred of evidence they used to justify this blatant War of Aggression (War Crime) has nothing to do with it. Pay no attention to the elephant behind the curtain.
(The fact that George’s Daddy couldn’t kill Sadaam, and that Sadaam tried to kill George’s Daddy, and that now George keeps Sadaam’s
penis pistol in his office after having him hung is, we hope, just the pathological icing on the cake of twisted psyches involved in this sordid tragedy)
Unfortunately, those investors who bought into candy and flower futures in anticipation of a run on the market by Iraqis welcoming their liberators….didn’t do so well. Nor did the occupiers. Though the man in charge of clusterfucking the Occupation beyond even the lowest of expectations, L. Paul Bremer….says he wouldn’t do anything differently
BLITZER: You still think it was the right decision?
BREMER: Yes, I do.
BLITZER: Despite everything we now know that there were no weapons of mass destruction, that any connection between Al Qaida and Saddam Hussein was very minimal if there was anything serious there. You still think it was the right thing to do?
BREMER: I do. I think it was the right thing to do, and I think Iraq is on the road now to becoming – it will take time – a democratic government in the middle of the Middle East, which is, in itself, quite an accomplishment.
So, I respectfully disagree with the senator. And I think it’s not clear – he makes the argument – I don’t think it’s true – that we are less safe than we were before. I don’t think that’s true. We have lost almost 4,000 Americans’ lives there, and that’s a tragic cost that we have had to pay.
Yes a tragic cost…..remind me why we had to pay it again, though? Oh, never mind, you will just recycle the same CYA bullshit you War Criminals have been spouting for half a decade now.
Returning to our history………who could have anticipated that the citizens of a sovereign nation would resist it’s Imperialist Occupiers? Well….just about everyone but said occupiers. More proof that having your head firmly up your ass tends to disrupt the old cognitive powers. And of course the fact that Iraq as we know it was invented as a country by previous Imperialists and has always been a hotbed of ethnic and sectarian rivalry that would erupt as soon as it had the chance seems to have gotten lost in the Republican Rectum as well. Sure…tons of people told them it would be the biggest blunder and tragedy in the history of American Foreign Policy….but what do those guys know?
A Government was formed and peoples fingers got colorfully and photogenically purpleized, those elected promptly stuck their purpled fingers up their rosy red rectums and have been sitting on them ever since. The one thing I have to give the Iraqi “Government” credit for is not selling off their oil to the first schmuck to come along with some magic beans.
Years and years of sectarian violence and insurgency against the Occupiers and rivals for power ensue. Again, who could have anticipated this? It’s not like there have ever been other instances of Imperial Occupation that have turned out badly…are there?
Little Donny Rumsfeld, whose delusions of mental grandeur apparently trumped all military wisdom, history, advice and common sense and is directly responsible for not just his part of the invasion, but the implementation of torture and the prolongation of disaster based on his THEORY of how wars work, by not sending enough occupiers….is finally fired. Four years after the invasion, four years into an occupation that caused 4 million refugees to flee their homes, the clowns in charge finally hearkened to the fact that you need a massive amount of boots on the ground to oppress a country of proud freedom fighters, (walk a mile in their shoes) escalated the number of brave American soldiers who have been required to risk…and pay with….their lives for these asshats stunning hubris and its accompanying jaw dropping incompetence. In combination with Blackwater, a huge mercenary army paid for by the American taxpayers and headed by semi-admitted Christian Crusaders, they have manged to quash the violence down to a level that the asshats in the MEDIA have been able to successfully spin into “success.” After which, they promptly stopped reporting any evidence that they too have their hatrack worthy heads up their Hershey Highways. (Are we sensing a theme?) And are thus facilitating the occupation, which THEY were so instrumental in abetting and mythologizing, to continue unchallenged….instead of leading each hour of “news” with a giant WTF??? banner superimposed over the Mission Accomplished banner of Commander Codpiece.
And what, the intelligent student of history might ask at this point, of the Democrats, the putative opposition Party? Surely they were fighting tooth and nail and doing all they could to oppose, counter, and legislate the war out of existence or at least defund it, cutting off George and Dick’s allowance so that the could no longer play Armymen with the lives of real people? Sadly, tragically, heartbreakingly…even after the American People elected them in truly stunning numbers in 2006 …specifically as a reaction to the now unpopular war, counting on them to stop the insanity with this clear mandate…the
fearless feckless Democratic ‘Leadership,’ spent their time cowering in fear of being called bad names by Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity….at the cost of nearly a thousand more American lives since the were elected…to stop the loss of American lives.
And here we stand today, the stopgap surge about to fail, at the cost of a now indisputably broken military and National guard. The summer heat about to raise the levels of violence, in the wake of a now broken internal coalition between the warlord Al Sadr and his enemies….and STILL….with no solution or resolution anywhere NEAR a horizon visible to the human eye.
MAYBE….after eight more months of Stupid Campaign Tricks….someone other than this older, more senile version of the madman George “the Torturer” Bush and his Zombiemaster Dick “Plame Treason” Cheney will be elected
Elected to sit in the White House to preside over and attempt to repair the incomprehensible damage that George Bush….who unlike the President at the beginning of this little jaunt through history has NOT been impeached….has inflicted upon the world…and America.
An America that has become a systematic torturer and imprisoner of innocents without trial. An America that has killed perhaps hundreds of thousands Of Iraqis who had been minding their own business. An America that has given up or been stripped of its most precious and fundamental Constitutional Rights for the sake of “security.” An American teetering on the edge of Depression thanks not only to a TWO TRILLION dollar folly of titanic dimensions….but also to massive tax cuts for the rich and superrich…..in a time of war…when ordinary people are sacrificing their brothers and sisters and sons and daughters….
All for……all for…….all for….