And what family doesn’t?
What is the biggest danger this site faces?
The biggest danger to this sites health: excessive politeness and agreement.
Lack of conflict, leading to a saccharine paradise of conformity and a lack of challenging each other to grow and learn and change.
Conflict avoidance leading to self-censorship group think and echo-chamberiness.
The second greatest danger? People thinking this is some kind of flawless paradise and getting pissed when it is not exactly THEIR picture of paradise. That is the weakness of a paradisaical model. When ANY flaw appears in a supposed paradise, any little thing that takes away the perception of a perfect paradise…. people reject the whole thing, because it is only ALMOST paradise, now that a flaw has been found.
The good being rejected for a lack of perfection.
What is the greatest strength of the site?
The hearts of the people here…..despite all of our individual flaws. Which are many, starting at the very top.
For the strength in those hearts are what allow us to keep fighting, through all the obstacles both internal and external. Everyone here has been through a ton of shit in their lives and fought through it and survived.
“Be kind to everyone you meet, for they are all fighting a great battle.”
And the folks here are not only fighting the battles that every human fights on this planet, but have also CHOSEN to fight against the multitude of permutations of evil and try to make the world better. Each in their own way, each with their own style, each through their own flaws.
SURELY we can weather these internal conflicts and still thrive! Piece O fucking cake, babay! All we have to do is use our big ass hearts, and not give in to our little ass egos. Humans learn and change and grow through conflict faster than y any other method: conflict is good….IF it is done well. We MOSTLY avoid conflict not out of a distaste for the conflict itself, but as a way to avoid learning and growing. The preceding statement is based on one premise though…that conflict be approached and carried out honestly and sincerely.
The only problem I have with conflict is when it is just conflict for the SAKE of conflict….iow, trolling.
So….what am I as zen dictator going to do about the current conflict on the site?
Nothing! Work it out yourselves kiddies! Just try not to break any lamps, k? If the furniture starts to get broken I will do something.
I will throw out a couple of clues.
Clue one: If a person of color says you are acting like a racist, it is incumbent on you to sit down and take a good hard look at your self.
Clue two: If you want to change hearts and minds and make things better, the best opening line is NOT: fuck you you fucking fuck fucker fucking asshole fuck! And since painting everyone with the same broad brush is the essence of racism, CUT IT THE FUCKING FUCK OUT! I honestly and rudey mean that!
Bonus clue: Folks seem to think that you are REQUIRED to be nice to each other to post here. That is not true. NO ONE WHO POSTS IN GOOD FAITH WILL BE BANNED. We have not banned a single person…and will not….who is making an honest effort to contribute to the site. The only people who have and will be banned are folks who are here to purposefully disrupt or tear down the site.
The reason it is so nice here…so paradisaical is because we make it that way. Because we are good people, who are trying to make a better world. If that takes not being “nice” sometimes, that is ok. As long as we do our best to deal with and respond to it honestly. Their is no double standard, if you want to be rude, and cuss people out etc, go for it. But do it honestly and be upfront about it…..and be prepared to deal with the consequences. Not from me, but from the other nice people here. If you have a problem, state it openly and honestly….and as rudely as you wish…if you are prepared to handle the blowback. If conflict upsets you, as it does me sometimes….just stay out of it. No one is required to participate in conflict. But if you have something to say, stand up and say it. After all that is what we are here to do to the Powers That Be, so we must be able to do it among ourselves here. Niceness is nice, but the price of avoiding conflict JUST to have a pleasant atmosphere is a dangerous thing. Remember….honest dissent is valued here.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled deprogramming.
Disclaimer: This post is inherently flawed and written in an undercaffeinated state.