The American Media As Comedy

You know, folks, there comes a time, as has occurred with yours truly, when you have to take a good friend aside and tell him, “You know, Joe, you’re so screwed up, I know we’ve been friends for years…but dude, I can’t be your buddy anymore…”

That happened for me with the United States of America, as you all know, when the Democratic Quisling Party, elected to stop the Madness of King George, simply threw in with him rather than do their jobs like, I don’t know, restore the Constitution, and some form of sanity, to American government.

And you guys woudn’t believe how incredibly (and tragically) comedic I am finding the American MSM right now…

I mean, if I didn’t know I was watching Cable “News” stations, I’d swear a comedic genius had dressed up the stage of Saturday Night Live and co-opted John Stewart’s and Stephen Colbert’s writers as the Comedy Team From Hell…

I mean…are you guys kiddin’ me?

I mean, I won’t even make a list…I only have to turn the television on at any time, and mirth and hilarity are sure to ensue…

Take Chris Mattheews “Hardball.”  Oh My God. This show is too much.  Yesterday, after having watched Tweety cheer-lead for Commander Cod-Piece for the last seven years, all of a sudden, he has hard and probing questions for…Ex-President Bill Clinton on Clinton’s statement that he opposed the Iraq invasion from the beginning…

Well, we all know that’s bunk, but it was still high comedy watching Tweety suddenly rediscover his reporting instincts and go for the throat with hard-hitting and pertinent questions…one only can wonder why the same mind-set goes out the window when he discusses George W. Bush…

I watched him fling question after question at his panel, frothing and drooling with indignation that an ex-President (out of office for nearly seven years) had said something that wasn’t necessarily true…he was outraged, I tell you…he wasn’t buying it…and I was holding my side..

Oh, the irony…and yes, it’s funny, because I don’t even have to tell you all why it’s so ironic…anyone with a brain cell surely would have had a few explode watching Tweety yesterday…and all I could do was laugh ruefully and check my citizenship…with relief…


Or how about Joe Scarborough?

A guy who fled Congress after his lover was found dead in his office…and he sits on his perch at MSNBC night after night (morning after morning now) passing moral judgment on liberals…bemoaning the firing of Don Imus for speaking his mind while having gleefully advocated the firing of Rosie O’Donnell…for speaking her mind…I mean, how can one not laugh?


How about CNN?

Is this the same station I used to watch as a “sane voice” of reason in American politics back in the ’90’s?

Maybe I was just smoking too much hydro back in the ’90’s and just didn’t notice…

Now, is that really Larry King or did the King Tut museum start another tour?

Is Wolf Blitzer really a journalist?  Really?  What makes him one?  I can’t figure out what he’s even doing on a television set, let alone mediating debates…

Did aliens snatch all of their brains and turn them into pumpkins?  Is Lou Dobbs insane or just an idiot?  Or just a nicotene-breathed racist?  I really can’t tell, but his beet-faced anti-spic tirades are a joy to watch on slow days…not because he’s right, but because I know I’m watching a News station in the most powerful nation on earth…make an ass of itself and its citizens…hey, if you don’t laugh…you pick up an AK, I guess…


Or, turn to Foxnews, where whatever the Rethugs are doing to American while it bends over…is the fault of the Democrats…

Al Qaeda – votes Democratic

Osama – registered Democrat

Wishing Death of Democrats – Patriotism

Questioning Geoge W. Bush – Treason

Ann Coulter – Patriot

John Kerry – Traitor

Sean Hannity?  Please stop…your chin makes me laugh before you even open that gutter-hole…and your hair…hey Sean, Wal-Mart just called…they want their Ken-doll head back…

Sean Hannity embezzles money in the form of charity for veterans, and the very suckers he’s ripping off cheer for him.

Yes, I’m calling American soldiers suckers.  Those ones are, you know the ones, the ones slapping Hannity and President Codpiece on the back, with tears in their eyes as they gaze adoring at the guys giving them the biggest shaft since…well, I don’t think anyone in America’s been shafted by anyone like the American military by an Administration whose primary qualifying test for employment seems to be: How creatively did you get out of service during Vietnam?

Anyone putting their life on the line for George W. Bush and who actually admires people like Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh…I’m sorry…you’re suckers, and so unbelievably ignorant that I can’t even comment further on it…

It’s like the plantation slaves rising up against the Quakers to protect their masters…and doing so willingly and gleefully…how stupid would those slaves have been?

I rest my case…


You know, I’ve just started…I may make this an ongoing series, because one you stop being outraged by America and just view it as a modern-day Rome…

You can’t help but laugh when watching its cable news stations…


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  1. the MSM dissect last night’s Rethug handling of the Religious Test posed to them last night…you know, the one that isn’t supposed to be posed, according to that quaint little Constitution…

    I need more coffee…this is gold…

  2. handing out candy to kids in Iraq with no dental plan and had very little expectations of living more than one more year, while she was giving them candy, they were asking for water, which she quite politely ignored.

  3. the press would be all over it

    • Turkana on November 29, 2007 at 19:03

    in such a manner that there are future historians, and that they can write honest histories, our mass media will be as universally condemned as will be our worst governments. one could not be what it is without the other.

  4. It is entertainment informed by ‘newsiness’

  5. I don’t even think I need to say anything

    • TheRef on November 29, 2007 at 20:32

    corporations as cash cows similar to the plethora of fake reality shows that are making the rounds.

    News shows of the genre Matthews, O’Reilly, Olberman, Scarborough, et al, are cheap to produce and relatively cheap to air. They provide a platform for the media corporations to broadcast twenty+ minutes of paying commercials each hour. Truth is not a necessary ingredient in any of the shows. Audience is the only thing that matters. People tune into one or another of the shows to be entertained. Viewers tune in to hear what they want to hear. Most could care less if factual information is being blasted across the airwaves.

    As long as the audience exists, sponsors will be available and the show(s) will go on. Truth is immaterial to the process …profits come from advertising dollars not a high rating from the truth squad.

    As has been expressed in Greenwald and elsewhere over the past few days, being loose with the truth has spread to the print journalism community as well.  

  6. You have summed it all up so beautifully and with a dash of humor, such that I don’t think any of us need enumerate the misinformation and disinformation of the MSM anymore.  You’ve said it ALL!  Thanks for letting us off the hook!! 😉

  7. Back in the ’90s, I was a reporter for People (I needed the money, okay?), and we used to do some interesting stories — teen pregnancy, cryogenics, people living off the grid in the middle of the city. Plus we could still do the completely wacky pieces, like the woman who made art from dryer lint. It wasn’t quality journalism, by any means, but it was pretty  harmless.

    Then Entertainment Tonight became a hit and all of sudden I was being told to through Brad Pitt’s trash cans (didn’t do it), spend evenings in the ladies’ at Viper Room and see who was using what (tried it – boring!), and basically just dig up dirt on anybody and everybody. That was when I quit “journalism.” And ever since then, I’ve just been watching in horror as news gathering and reporting turn into bad parodies of what they are supposed to be.

    I hope you turn this into a series — your take on it is hilarious! And completely accurate!!  


  8. I’m afraid.  As the business world went from comically insane the cartoon Dilbert became popular.

    As business continued and decended into the current Satan-inspired entity of today, Dilbert was no longer funny.

    If I had more time, effort, money and didn’t have to work I would start something like and take in the daily propaganda analysis big time.

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