Tag: The Stars Hollow Gazette

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Interestingly enough (to me) this will be my 155th essay on DocuDharma.

It’s kind of a little unfair to pfiore to really talk about baseball (which she had suggested as a topic when she asked me to do witr), but that sent me digging and really wishing for a good index search.  Maybe next revision which may come sooner or later depending on how pacified’s open source project is going.

Anyway pfiore remembered an essay where I talked about baseball and the one I think she is after is the one I wrote just before one of our Openings (there were about 6 or 7, as budhy got settled in his new digs).

So Today’s The Big Day!

When I think about blogging as art I see it as halfway between a Magazine and a TV Channel.  You have an audience for the Gilmore Girls and when they tune in they expect to see it.

But also a Community blog is a team effort, the kind of artistry you see on a Baseball Diamond between 9 people who love the game they play.  Sort of a dance, but competitive.

First day of the season.  Home opener.  Score is nothing nothing and anything can happen.

That said I expect we’ll get our asses kicked and be cleaning up the mess for weeks, but I love this game.

It’s a long season, 162 games at least.  I’m not disappointed in the talent, but we’ve never played together before and you can only expect miscommunication and errors.

It’s all good.

As we learn together we will get stronger as a team.  Pretty soon we’ll be turning those double plays and figure out where the bumps in the field are.  We have the pitching to succeed and the bullpen to close.

Now we just have to start scratching out the runs.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Well, what I really want to do is just promote Tia’s Essay- Chanukah: first memory, but unaccustomed as she is to fame and glory, I’m inclined to let someone else accept the responsibility.

Tonight at her other gig we chatted a bit about Mormonism which led me to look up some Twain (here too).

Now I have to laugh a little bit because I’m a very pink Buddhist and I think all of it is rather silly and the story of Christ in North America no wackier than what comes from the pen of L. Ron Hubbard.

Still, there is the question of should we let this moment pass without examining the faith at all, one about which most Americans know as much as they do about… well, Islam for instance?

It is very personal and right off the top of my head I can name about a dozen massacres and wars over the meaning of the Trinity (which was settled at the Council of Nicea) because it’s a fairly common heresy.  Having a separate line of prophecy post Jesus and the Apostles and entirely different scriptures that are ‘corrected’ versions of the old and new testaments puts you smack dab in Allah territory if you ask me, but I’m no expert.

There should be no religious test for office, that’s what the Constitution says, and I don’t hate and despise Romney for being anything but a racist Republican who doesn’t think Muslims are fit to serve in the highest offices of the land.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

I remember the best sliding day ever.

The Episcopal Church next to the library had three parking lots connected with driveways that sloped fairly steeply.

Conditions were perfect, ice storm following a light snow.  When you came to the piles at the bottom of the last lot it was easy enough to crunch through the crust and slow down.  You were headed up slope anyway weinie.

Had perfect equipment too.  Runner polished and waxed Flexible Flyers.  Belly skates.

It was just my sister and I on this particular occasion and after the obligatory high speed suicide runs that day’s particular pleasure was how many 360s you could throw before the end.

We were adventurous sliders on our block.  The regular run took you through 6 hedges in 5 back yards before it dumped you spark shedding and grinding out in the street.  Special favorites got to use the popular kids’ ‘Devils Drop’, but I was never that popular and I didn’t like it so much as you usually ended up with your head next to a tree.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Once upon a time we had a sun porch that was covered all in windows and each Holiday season Emily would tape up stencils and paint them in Tempra and leave the light on for a stained glass effect.

That same house had a balcony with a window that my sister and I would play “store” at.

In the near back yard was nothing much but grass, but in the near far back yard was a playset with a swing and a sandbox next to it.

The far, far back yard was forest until you came out above the Texaco Station.

We were three houses from the stoplight across the street from the school where mom worked, and a hundred yards from the A&P where we shopped.  A quarter mile from the butcher who sold prime beef and penny candy.

We went to church in the big church in Hartford with the bowling alley in the basement that the sixth grade Sunday school class studied in (yeah it was duck pin bowling and yeah I stuck out Sunday school long enough to find out they didn’t actually let them bowl).

There were lots of nooks and crannies including a Choir Loft at the top of the top most tower just past the Music Director’s Office and the parlors the Sewing Circles (what?  Bible Study?) used during the week.

Also a Hall/Auditorium where we had big church suppers and amateur theatricals.  Richard had great enthusiasm and delivery but couldn’t (and still can’t) remember his lines so he is hard to work with.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Well the bird tree is quiet so it must be fall.

What the heck’s a bird tree?

A bird tree is the one in the parking lot you don’t want to park under unless you want to present a challenge to your car washer.  Every time they get excited the tree (which looks totally normal until then) explodes in a blur of tweets and expands like a balloon.

Who likes Hitchcock?

So not too long until skating season though it does come later and later each year.  Time to break out your layers and bundle up.  Bell ringing in the streets.  Blizzards not of snow but of obligations and scheduling (people think I’m a task master).  Time grows as short as the day.

Everything is pretty much so naked and raw that it hurts to look at, but you can’t close your eyes while you’re driving.  That leads to unfortunate circumstances that can easily be avoided by staying on the road.

Winter is kind of better because there are snowy bumper cushions to soften the hard edges and cover up the dirt.  There is something sharp about fall, but I do give it this-

It’s not black fly and mud season.

The Stars Hollow Gazette- Updated!

You know, people who work on holidays are really performing a public service.

I like Thanksgiving because it’s time and a half and dead slow.  You’re sold out of milk anyway so you can basically just zone.

Black Friday is busy for the cashiers and more so for the floor sales people who have to answer all the questions.  Not so much in Stock where you were much more likely to get a call for boxes that were in short supply (and invariably stored in the big uncataloged pile behind the facade mirror with the unsorted hangers).

Your basic job is to deliver carts of merchandise between the loading dock and the sales floor storerooms.  You need to be able to read a routing card and sign off that the seal is unbroken and matches before the Department head accepts inventory control.  Someone has to do it.

The first place I worked, by the end of the season we were storing things on the roof and in two semi-trailers in the loading dock.  The second place the loading dock was in the basement of a ‘historic’ store.

The store was so historic in fact that I was practically the last one standing when they closed it, frantically doing inventory of some hideous green abstract floral sheets 100 years out of season we were looking to dump on a liquidator.

It all falls in the rounds.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

I have odd hobbies and want to work out a few issues.

The Stars Hollow Gazette is always an Open Thread.  Nothing too much off topic.  I’ll be around most of the weekend should you need my assistance.  Who knows, might post me some content.  As far as reliable publication of crap, 11 pm there and Midnightish here.

If I don’t publish on time terrible things will happen.  The Earth will stop in it’s orbit and plunge, flaming, into the Sun.  The Devil will eat our souls.

Something like that.

Anyway I’m going to work out some inspirational words in HTML below so expect lots of hideous results and deletion interspersed with the occasional curse.

Drat. Foiled again.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Oh great.

I get to be the one to push Pretty Bird Woman House down.  Well I don’t care what you think.

I’m actually kind of happy with where we are as a blog.

I’m incredibly impressed with the quality of our original content.  Our comments are overwhelmingly witty and thoughtful and frankly- there are a fair amount of them.

As a group we’re working to make this a place that people feel comfortable expressing themselves.  There are no bad ideas, only bad actors.  Wrong! is just a rating and has virtually no effect on your standing here.  Hide is for content that is offensive.  There is no Auto Ban, your fate is decided in the committee of 30+ Contributing Editors and Admins.

This particular mini rant is inspired by the remarks of my activist brother (who also has an account on dK I gave him as a gift).  When I talked with him today he was all excited and worried about a comment he had made here!

Well Michael, you’re part of the family and I feel naturally protective, but this is a pillow fight.  Your disapproval of each other can NOT be used to harm you here.

For the most part that’s true wherever you are and yet people are so defensive.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

As some of you may know I’m still an active member of RedState.  The subject comes to mind because in addition to all the Candidate Crap I spent a little time in a diary about RedState that I found uncomfortable.

The diarist was amazed that they could be ‘wasting’ their time talking about anything but politics.

I pointed out that the blurb is “Conservative News and Community.”

Now the reason I still survive is I don’t go there much and never if I disagree about politics.  I talk about sports mostly, I grieved with Streiff about the passing of the F-14 because in Harpoon Phoenix missiles kick ass and you can never have enough.  Leon thinks I’m unserious because I supported Online Integrity, but then again Booman thinks I’m an ass clown so there you go.

You can’t get hung up on civility.

Now by community what I mean is what I was seeking when I joined dK, a place where I could express myself without worrying about pissing everyone off if I happened to let slip that I thought W was an asshole (I have since amended my judgment to war criminal).  I never intended that every waking minute be devoted to that opinion, just that it shouldn’t disqualify me from being an ok person to have it.

At the same time I have the experience to understand that communities are complex structures, and ambition and jealousy and struggles for power are just the way monkeys interact in groups.  Smart monkeys learn to pursue their own banana.

My guiding principle is this- there are no bad opinions, but there are bad actors.

“It is the madness of folly to expect mercy from those who have refused to do justice.  Even mercy, where conquest is the object, is only a trick of war.”- Tom Paine

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Fall is election time for capo di tutti.  Currently the Corleones are content to watch from a distance for the most part.  After Michael and I cleaned up the joint and moved to Nevada things have been quiet for the family, not that we haven’t seen a few bodies buried.

This is real politics-

Harold is a veteran who has run before and lost, to both me and Michael among others.  This time he was unopposed until 2 days before the election.  He has the very best resume among all the current members.

A lock?

We have planning meetings where we democratically develop our platform (have an agenda? nobody comes).  At one meeting this year that Harold attended (because that’s what you do as a candidate) he vociferously opposed a really stupid idea which was adopted.

There was a really talented gal who will do an outstanding job, all of the retired capi had been recruiting her all year, but she would only run if her arch enemy (not Harold at all) ran.

So she got an email that Harold had been a supporter of this ludicrous notion (which would have been ignored anyway and which was a total lie), and on the spot her Al Gore campaign started and in three days she was capo di tutti.

Badda Bing.

Hmm… what does Don Vito notice?

Who was in that poorly attended meeting?  Who has relationships with our new Capo?  Are they attempting to clear the field?

That is politics.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

Let’s assume for a moment that all our fondest hopes and dreams come true and on January 20th, 2009 we are looking at-

  • A Democratic President
  • Veto Proof Democratic Majorities in The House and Senate (Veto Proof >= Filibuster Proof for the constitutionally math impaired)
  • A substantially larger Progressive Caucus in those same bodies

In other words complete and total victory, our ears soothed by their lamentations (can you say “schadenfreude”).

What would you like to see next?

Now number one with a bullet for me is restoration of our Constitutional Liberty with subsequent prosecution for this gang of criminals and thieves that currently occupy our government.  Coming up second with a respectable effort is COMPLETE.  AND.  TOTAL.  WITHDRAWAL.  FROM.  IRAQ.  NOW!

Still there are other issues- Universal Health Care.  Global Warming.  Taxation.  Social Security.  Immigration.  Homeland Security.

I’m sure I’ve missed a few including some of my favorites, but I’ve left some in that don’t necessarily break progressive because they won’t all break that way due to our Entrenched Media Elite.

Among things I’m in favor of is progressive taxation in the FDR style complete with an absolute inheritance cap.  How much more than $100 million do you actually need to inherit from daddy Paris?  Social Security?  Why do you stop paying after the first $250K of income again?  Don’t even talk to me about getting your money in Capital Gains, it’s all regular income.  Sorry about your greens fees at the club old boy, maybe you can thrash a caddy to work out your frustration.

Now in fact I’m sure that the pain would need to be much greater to get anything near that enacted, but it’s not like things are going to be much better than they are right now and they could be far worse.  I think it’s a 50% chance we’ll be in a full blown recession with rampant inflation because of the collapse of the dollar.  There is no indication at all we will be out of Iraq.  I’ve read persuasive commentaries that the tipping point on climate change has already happened and the ugliness of that scenario is a gift that never stops giving.

Frankly (and here’s the big windup, you can stop paying attention soon) I think it’s highly UNlikely that we’ll be able to stop doing what we’re doing now.  And what is that?  Everything we can.  Specifically, but not limited to, applying pressure for progressive legislation to our Representatives and challenging the dominance of the Entrenched Media Elite.

Your suggestions below.

The Stars Hollow Gazette

‘Tis surprising to see how rapidly a panic will sometimes run through a country; yet panics, in some cases, have their uses- the mind soon grows through them, and acquires a firmer habit than before.  They are the touchstones of sincerity and hypocrisy, and bring things and men to light which might otherwise have lain forever undiscovered.

They have the same effect on secret traitors, many a disguised Tory has lately shown his head.

I have been tender in raising the cry against these men, and used numberless arguments to show them their danger; but it will not do to sacrifice a world either to their folly or their baseness.  The period is now arrived in which either they or we must change our sentiments, or one or both must fall.

And what is a Tory?  What is he?  Every Tory is a coward; for servile, slavish, self-interested fear is the foundation of Toryism; and a man under such influence, though he may be cruel, can never be brave.

But, before the line of irrecoverable separation be drawn between us, let us reason the matter together: Your conduct is an invitation to the enemy, yet not one in a thousand of you has heart enough to join him.  He is as much deceived by you as the American cause is injured by you.  He expects you will all take up arms, and flock to his standard with muskets on your shoulders. Your opinions are of no use to him, unless you support him personally, for ’tis soldiers, and not Tories, that he wants.

I once felt all that kind of anger, which a man ought to feel, against the mean principles that are held by the Tories- “Well! give me peace in my day.”  I consider W the greatest enemy the Tories have.  He is bringing a war into their country which, had it not been for him and partly for themselves, they had been clear of.

Let it be told to the future world that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive, that the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet and to repulse it.  Say not that thousands are gone, turn out your tens of thousands.  Throw not the burden of the day upon Providence, but show your faith by your works.

It matters not where you live, or what rank of life you hold, the evil or the blessing will reach you all.  The far and the near, the rich and the poor, will suffer or rejoice alike.  The heart that feels not now is dead, the blood of your children will curse your cowardice which shrank back at a time when a little might have saved the whole and made them happy.

‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but one whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principles unto death.  My own line of reasoning is to myself as straight and clear as a ray of light.

Let them call me rebel and welcome, I feel no concern from it; but I should suffer the misery of devils were I to make a whore of my soul by swearing allegiance to one whose character is that of a sottish, stupid, stubborn, worthless, brutish man.  I conceive likewise a horrid idea in receiving mercy from a being who at the last day shall be shrieking to the rocks and mountains to cover him, and fleeing with terror from the orphan, the widow, and the slain of America.

There are cases which cannot be overdone by language, and this is one.  There are persons too who see not the full extent of the evil which threatens them; they solace themselves with hopes that the enemy, if he succeed, will be merciful.

It is the madness of folly to expect mercy from those who have refused to do justice.  Even mercy, where conquest is the object, is only a trick of war.

He is mercifully inviting you to barbarous destruction, and men must be either rogues or fools that will not see it.  I dwell not upon the vapors of imagination, I bring reason to your ears and, in language as plain as A B C, hold up truth to your eyes.

I thank God, that I fear not.  I see no real cause for fear.  I know our situation well, and can see the way out of it.

By perseverance and fortitude we have the prospect of a glorious issue; by cowardice and submission, the sad choice of a variety of evils.

Look on this picture and weep over it!  And if there yet remains one thoughtless wretch who believes it not, let him suffer it unlamented.

Tom Paine

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