Jarrow, 1911.

Pretty uniforms is how I feel about the Seahawks.

By which I mean painfully ugly but they are an otherwise unobjectionable team no more evil than any other unless they are playing one of my particular favorites and win.

They face the Native Americans who I hate on 3 different levels.

First of all they’re divisional rivals of the Jints that I’d despise just as much as the Evils except they employ fewer dog killers and are generally more hapless and ineffectual.

Second is their racist name I’ve decided not to dignify by repetition.

Third (and I can not emphasize this enough), they are the Village darlings and the fawning bootlicking of the courtier class is bi-partisan and universal.

‘nuf said.

I am going to the movies where I am going to watch actors attempt to sing show tunes and get weepy eyed when I hear anthems like this-

My friend Bobby will be watching while I’m distracted by flickering images.

As I told TMC yesterday (offline, don’t bother looking) throwball is more about who you hate the most.

Today we start with 2 teams either of which is an approprate target for your scorn and derision.

On the one hand we have the Bolts–

(M)any of the prominent old-time Colts, many of whom had settled in the Baltimore area, were bitter and chose to cut all ties to the relocated Colts team. Most notable and vocal among them was Johnny Unitas, who recognized himself solely as a player for the Baltimore Colts until the day he died, with his estate defending that stand to this day.

And on the other we have the Carrion Crows who’s only redeeming feature is that they failed in their attempt to carpetbag away from the land of Cleves before the community was able to reclaim their name.

(T)he agreement stipulated that the Browns’ name, colors, uniform design and franchise records would remain in Cleveland. The franchise history includes Browns club records and connections with Pro Football Hall of Fame players. Modell’s Baltimore team, while retaining all current player contracts, would, for purposes of team history, appear as an expansion team, a “new franchise.”

So Bolts or Crows– slime pit Hell wrestling until they both get their asses kicked.

I wish.

Sigh.  The not troll in me is strong despite my birth below the bridge and it’s extremely hard to hide my green and gold heritage at times like this so I seldom bother.

I don’t care who they play much, when the pack is on the field I remember things like this–

The Packers are the only non-profit, community-owned major league professional sports team in the United States.

Try as I might I can’t find a topper to that single statement.  Today they face the all purples, but I’m a class warrior over ethnic, bachelor farmers not withstanding however soothing and melifluous their tones.

The Vikings are disadvantaged by the injury of Christian Ponder who may not start and by Lambeau Field, the 12th player.  On the other hand they beat the Pack just last week 37 – 34.

The Bengals were founded by Paul Brown, namesake of the Cleveland Browns, after being booted in a management struggle with Art Modell in the ’60s.

Now the only model Art is if you want to be the epitome of the greedy community blackmailing NFL owner but Paul was no prize either and it would be poetic justice to have the Bengals and Ravens face off and both lose while the souls of their former leaders drown each other in a slime pit in Hell which is why, as surprising as it is, I have some smidge of sympathy for a team from Texas who’s main sin is to choose the largest media market available after the carpetbagging departure of the unlamented Oilers.

Something I didn’t know is that this is exactly the same as last year’s matchup except for the fact that the Texans will be starting their starter instead of their third string back up (btw, they won that game).  They backed into this position in the most humiliating way possible however, losing their last 2 games in embarrassing defeats.

For the Bengals the question is whether Andy Dalton is any better than last year’s 3 picks indicate.

I’m told streaming video is available here but you can’t prove it by me.  Perhaps you have to register, something I’m reluctant to do even though I have several e-mail boxes just for crap like that.

Philadelphia Tries Out Condom Vending Machines To Combat ‘Epidemic’ STD Rates

By Tara Culp-Ressler posted from ThinkProgress Health

Jan 3, 2013 at 6:40 pm

Reuters reports that more than 400 public schools across the country currently make condoms available to students through a nurse, guidance counselor, or other school personnel. Less than ten percent of schools make condoms directly available to teens without an adult intermediary – in a basket, bowl, or vending machine – as Philadelphia’s schools have started to do.

It’s Philly, he’ll get to it.

January

February

March

April

May

June

Team Jon finally comes through with the 4th quarter.  Expect more on this breaking story tomorrow.

July

August

September

October

November

December