A Horse Argument

(4 pm. – promoted by ek hornbeck)

So my horse tells me he wants to be a person and I have to explain why this would be a bad deal.  What?  You are bored?  I shell out at least $300 bucks a month, I clean up your crap, give you your shots and fix your feet then you wimp out on the trail cause it’s a little warm out.  Listen, you got it good.


For your information I get maybe one meal a day, you get two.  I have not been to “the vet” in over four years now and every day when I get in the truck and go away all day I am NOT eating grass or galloping down woodland trails.

Then what are you doing?

It’s a people thing, it’s called work.

What is work?

See I have to leave and do something for other people so they give me money so I can feed you.

What is money?

I work and they give me these pieces of paper.  Then I take these pieces of paper to another place and they give me the stuff that fills your bucket twice a day.

Well why do you have to do all that?  Why don’t you just let us go to a grassy field so we can eat all day?

There aren’t anymore grassy fields.

No, that’s not right, you take us to green fields all the time.

Yes, I do but I don’t own those grassy fields.

What do you mean by own?

Again, it’s a people thing.  You only see the grass since you are a horse you don’t notice those barns in the middle of those fields.  Those are called houses and people live in them.  Unlike me, most of them would complain about you eating their grass and crapping on their lawn because people other than me own these barns and the grass that is around them.  We have to respect their space because we don’t own that barn or the grass around it.

Well allright I think I get it.

Be careful what you wish for.  I only explained a tiny fraction of my people world which is a mixed bag of good stuff but also a ton of evil stuff you have zero concept of.  Be happy you are a horse, be happy you are my horse.