Presidential wit.

A guy walks into a bar with a handful of shit,

And says, “Look at what I almost stepped in!”

According to the headlines, the president “killed” at the WH correspondents’ dinner.


Of course, they didn’t need quotes around “kills,” because it is probably literally true, since drones are flying 24/7 in the global war on terror.  The double entendre makes the headline twice as witty.

As Harold Pinter noted in 2005,

The crimes of the United States have been systematic, constant, vicious, remorseless, but very few people have actually talked about them. You have to hand it to America. It has exercised a quite clinical manipulation of power worldwide while masquerading as a force for universal good. It’s a brilliant, even witty, highly successful act of hypnosis.

The United States no longer bothers about low intensity conflict. It no longer sees any point in being reticent or even devious. It puts its cards on the table without fear or favour. It quite simply doesn’t give a damn about the United Nations, international law or critical dissent, which it regards as impotent and irrelevant.

“Over there” doesn’t mean what it used to mean.

There’s a little disassociation [operating predator drones via satellite], but once you get inside the trailer, you’re pretty much immersed in the world over there, for a couple of hours at a time, at least.

Then you step out and, uh, go back to your family and, uh, live like anyone else.

“Over there” once meant something different, but now it’s just a day job from which you return nightly to occupy your mind on the voluptuous cushion of propaganda, living like everyone else you didn’t kill that day.

“Over there” once meant “over there” in another sense, too.  These killing machines are now patrolling our borders, flying over our cities,

and washing up on our “sugar white beaches” during Spring break.

If the air force doesn’t retrieve it in the next couple of hours, I’m going to sell it on ebay.

The President’s joke was purely gratuitous — arbitrarily connecting presidential global assassination powers to the commonly-held, age-old fear of paternity certainty, the standard male fear of who controls reproductive rights in a male-dominated society – made only, if for any reason at all, to dull the senses to the obscenity of murder by fiat by blandly associating murder, or in this case, a not-entirely-taboo form of pre-emptive paternal “honor killing,” with the groaning laughter of a pre-stale joke, so the Jonas brothers never saw that punch-line coming.

More likely, the president lobbed that little hellfire missile out of sheer boredom among the villagers, because it’s so inconsequential, while being mildly subliminally stirring to the sexually repressed, murderous, and power-mad ideations.

He really is a funny guy.


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  1. With a pair of Caesars!

    bwah hah…eh.

  2. but a powerful nit wit.  Terrible humor – and shame on him for bringing his daughters into it considering the wedding parties and brides who were killed by said drones.

    The smartest guy in the room mixes it up with the villagers who eat it up.  

  3. against us with smart tech people – the nonAmerican kind?

  4. Man, does that give an insight into this guy’s psyche and, by extension, the sickness now present in the American body politic. The wet, bloody, organic jungles of death in Vietnam are now blissfully transformed into dry, lifeless deserts and mountains in Afghanistan with a caravan here and there, just right for remote control targeting.

    Agent Orange wouldn’t have made a good joke, but a predator drone is just dandy; clean, reuseable and safe. Even good enough for a few laughts. It protects you while screwing someone else, just great for party jokes.  

  5. Not exactly a profile in courage:

    You know, even as we enjoy each other’s company tonight, we’re also mindful of the incredible struggles of our fellow Americans in the Gulf Coast, both those leading the efforts to stem this crisis and those along the coast whose livelihoods are in jeopardy as a result of the spill.

    Notice how Obama tries to dissociate himself from those ‘leading the efforts to stem this cisis’.

    Wouldn’t want to get a little oil tar on those wingtips now would we, Barack?

  6. in a really nervous making scary way. I also did not like one bit his joke about GS. Both were little inside dark references to the fact that this bastard knows exactly what he is doing and thinks it’s cool. I try not to focus on Obama as he is just the front man for a criminal band but when confronted by his toothy grin and nasty side it’s hard not to think, he is as nasty and amoral as Bush and smarter. He doesn’t have the excuse of being a stark raving psychotic from a long line of psychotics. He doesn’t get any compassion from me as his crimes are masked in decency and hope.    

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