Glorifying Violence; Why My 9 Yr old Foregoes Football by His Choice

Lets forget that Hamburg abandoned the idea of starting first graders the year after Jake joined. Lets even forget how they looked like bobbleheads trying to hold up the helmets at that age.

Jake has long gotten over the abuse he endured as a pacifist kindergartner, the target of bullies who came home bruised. He has gotten over the fact I eventually had to take pictures of boot prints bruised into his back. I guess good parenting in the land of right wing toughies means something different then I anticipated. I failed him, I taught him to fight back way too late… including a trip to the emergency room with a spit open temple. His Dad did teach him that eventually- the bully, once his nose bloodied, left Jake alone.

Our football program started them too young and focused on the win, rather then the game.  It was the epitome of frustrated men trying to make their bones through their kids.  Over 3/4 did not return the next year. No one but “special” 5 kids had any idea of the rules, the rest were fodder for those coaches kids.

Realizing their mistake by enrollment, they changed admission from age 6 to 8. Still, with a $350 entree fee, and the gung-ho coaches, and the 2 hours 5 days a week for 3rd graders… the pickings were slim.

Perfect for Daddies who drilled their undersized sons trying to create future meal tickets… but suckage for normal families. Enrollment went down more. They wanted him.

Jake opted out. He didn’t like hurting his friends in practice. He didn’t much like being hurt, and his 6 yr old memories served him well. He didn’t like the deviousness and the aggression of the players on the playground. Dirty hits and blindsides were applauded.

He’s 9 now.

Attending a few games this year, he played with middle school kids, made interceptions, touchdowns and took tackles much to his pride. With kids 1-3 years older than him, he made his bones, big time. They all want him to play.

They say he rocks. He says “Nope.”

But he sounds like a man I once dated, who hated all sports….only to a lesser, less political degree.

The man said that sports glorifies the worst of humanity, made us enjoy subjugating others, made us acting “pack” and destroying others…

The boy?

He says, “I know I can take the hits, make the hits, beat them… but why? If it was for fun, I would, but its never for fun. They want real hurt.”

Out of the mouths of babes.

Pressed, he adds, “If its about being mean, KILLING your opponent, I just don’t like it, Mom. I’m good at it, but I’d rather play baseball… that’s about teamwork and doing your personal best, not hurting the other team.” He can throw and catch, run and take hits. He is a coaches dream… except he hates their ethics, What a guy!!!! He won’t be mean for the JOY of being mean.

I LOVE MY KID!

Flawed as I am, I must be doing something right.  

5 comments

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    • Diane G on October 23, 2008 at 03:46
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    watching college football…but is stuck on the rabid fan hate thing. He hates it.

    He rocks.

  1. The violence is important in US football.  And don’t overlook the corporate organization of the game.  The game mimics the structure of warfare.  It’s the only sport where college teams have nearly 100 “players” and coaches make more than Nobel prize winning professors.

    Maybe that’s why I love, and always loved the other football, soccer.  You can play it 2 on 2 and have fun.  A full size game is tremendous fun.  There are no time outs.  You don’t have to be a giant.  Agility and strategy and speed are highly prized.  You don’t have to flatten out the opposition, in fact, that’s usually not a good strategy.  It’s a worldwide game.  And you can play it anywhere on the planet.  Injuries are far, far fewer than in US football.  And imo, you can continue to play it into your 50s or 60s.  Further, because games tend to be low scoring, there’s a lot more to enjoy than just the goals.  They’re not lying when the Brazilians call it “The Beautiful Game”.

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