Jun 20 2008

Sorry…

Sorry about your privacy, which I took when I listened in on your phone calls, but as the Attorney General stipulated, at the behest of the President, I was hunting terrorists, so… it must’ve been really awful when your brother drank himself to death.

And sorry about your dog, which I ran over with my truck, but as the Attorney General stipulated, at the behest of the President, I was chasing terrorists, so… well… maybe you should get a beagle next time.

And sorry about your money, which I took from you bank account, but as the Attorney General stipulated, at the behest of the President, I’m using it to fight terrorists, so… you can just push back retirement, right?

And sorry about your house, which I had to confiscate, but as the Attorney General stipulated, at the behest of the President, I need them as a base of operations in order to fight terrorists, so… the view at dusk from the back porch is AMAZING!

And sorry about your husband, who I had to arrest, and, though I’m not sure exactly what he did (most likely he’s a terrorist), the Attorney General WILL absolutely stipulate that I did so at behest of the President, so… I’ve got the numbers of a really good lawyer (though I’m not sure you can even call them).

And really, really, REALLY sorry about your Constitution, which I had to debase beyond belief, but as the Attorney General stipulated, at the behest of the President, and on account of the terrorists, America simply can’t stand for all the things “America” once did, but… no one ever REALLY believed in “America”, did they?

15 comments

Skip to comment form

  2. The deal, expanding the government’s powers to spy on terrorism suspects in some major respects, would strengthen the ability of intelligence officials to eavesdrop on foreign targets. It would also allow them to conduct emergency wiretaps without court orders on American targets for a week if it is determined that important national security information would otherwise be lost. If approved, as appears likely, the agreement would be the most significant revision of surveillance law in 30 years.

    source

    • kj on December 7, 2008 at 17:27
    • #

    Hands in the Air- Step Away from the Real Food

Comments have been disabled.