Reworked poem (thanks cronie!)

i would leave …today
and walk straight through tomorrow
if only i knew
that i’d find
you

i remember thinking…
as we watched the
fire flies fading
like falling embers into the night
i should kiss you
in this smoldering light

in the morning…
memory brings the garden into bloom
i still smell days, just before rain
and hear the thud and splat
of water, gathering in the bird bath
and making mud of our path

the afternoon and the sun
fall through the bedroom window
all warm and yellow,
with a warmed breeze blowing over us
… those few perfect moments of rest
when there is no need for it…

these things, and a hundred more
make me pull open the door
and walk away from today
through tomorrow
and further

to find you…………………

………………
8/26/2007

now what a place… Cronie gave me a few ideas and i’d been mauling this piece because there was something not right… it sounded okay out loud, but didn’t read the same

for me… it’s exciting to have the balls to just hit the post on this thing and then to work it to a point that even i like it

33 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. so many lines to get caught up in that I end up repeating in my head.

  2. Thanks.

    Since for the last two days the internet gods have only allowed me on the sit long enough to make two comments…..I just want everyone to know,….I am having trouble getting on to the site!

    Now the exciting part….will it post?

  3. beautiful, thanks for sharing it. 

      • pfiore8 on August 27, 2007 at 12:12 am
        Author

      you point to something, though, that i like: his music is spare… not in sound or substance, but it leaves room for me

      maybe that’s why he’s so good

  4. you have lightened my soul….
    thank you…

Comments have been disabled.