There once was a man who tied me to a railroad track and chuckled, evilly as he departed, that there was nothing I could do to stop him, and that a train was going to run over me in a most gruesome way.
As I lie there, thinking of my own demise, another man came, and told me that he wanted in his heart of hearts to save me from that gruesome demise, but it would only be possible for him to save me if I supported his election with a donation, because he would have to be the Sheriff in order to be authorized to cut the Offical Handcuffs the bandit used to bind me to the tracks.
“There’s a $20 in my pocket, I gasped, desperately. Take it, get elected, but for god’s sake, get back here and save me, please!
Some time passed, and it was a hot sunny day, and I realized that before the train was going to run over me and realize my intended gruesome demise, I would die of thirst and wouldn’t feel the pain of the railroad wheels cutting my frail body in three pieces.
As my vision blurred from thirst and hunger, and just as I was about to go under forever, the second man returned, with a shiny gold star on his shirt.
“Here,” he said, lowering a bottle to my face and splashing it with clear, cold water out of a canteen. I slurped eagerly at the wet salvation. “I also brought some food,” he said. “Slowly, slowly,” he admonished me as my teeth gnashed at the sandwich he held up to my face, as my hands were tied to my sides and I could only move my fingers a millimeter or two. “You are going to need your strength”.
“Thank God!” I yelled. “Now, untie me, and we can both get out of here before the train arrives or the Evil Man returns!”